It never ceases to amaze me how quickly the Christmas season
comes each year. I mean, we know it’s coming like clockwork.
It’s on every
calendar, but up here in the ADKs we love our autumn season. Most of the
tourists have left (except for weekends- maybe). Our streets are quieter. The
trails are a little more user friendly. The stores and shops are less frantic
and crowded. Even our homes and families are back into the routine with school
and work. We effortlessly float through the season enjoying the beauty and
deepening sunshine – until Thanksgiving.
Thanksgiving is our first major
holiday with a significant school break. Then all of a sudden it’s over and we
are staring Christmas in the face! Eyeball to eyeball with shopping,
decorating, cooking, cleaning, relatives, travel, parties, wrapping, singing,
concerts, and the list continues ad nauseum.
Big sigh… ugh… I already feel overwhelmed!
Years ago I received some great counsel about preparing for
the holidays and all of the crazy that goes on. When it comes right down to it
– “crazy” is not really the word you want to associate with Christmas, right?
I
would love for my Christmas season to be serene, beautiful, enjoyable, calm, and
savored.
I learned the hard way that these mellow feelings about the
season do not come by accident. They only come if I am purposeful in making
them come. I needed to prepare
emotionally, physically and spiritually for the Christmas season and all that
it entails. I needed to control it and not let the chaos control me.
In the
next weeks leading up to Christmas I am going to address three areas for
positive change, (one for each part of the mind, body and soul triad) to
encourage you in your endeavors to take the holiday by the horns (or the tree
by the tinsel or the wrapping by the ribbons – you get my drift…) and make it
the most enjoyable, healthy and meaningful Christmas season ever!
If you are like me, just the borage of preparatory thoughts
and lists that come with Christmas can freeze me in an overwhelmed and panicked
state. I expend much more emotional energy fretting over how everything will
get done than actually doing it.
So I recommend that on a day when you have
time, sit down with your calendar and a blank piece of paper. First, make a
list of all of the events you are expected to attend.
Now stop. Do you
really NEED to attend ALL of these events? I know you want to but if you start
feeling the crazies comin’ on, it’s time for a break. Circle the events most
important to you. Focus on those events. If you feel up to it, attend the
others, but it’s no sweat if you decide to stay home and read a book or wrap
presents. The best gift you can give yourself is time and space to breathe.
Slow down and enjoy the moment you are in right now.
Now look at your list and put squares around the events that
seem to cause you the most stress. If having your MIL (mother-in-law) over to
your house causes you to break out in a nervous sweat looking for a place to
hide, I highly recommend you start preparing mentally now for that
visit.
Or maybe you feel expected to make a large main dish, 4 veggies, 3
starches, 5 different Christmas cookies, have a spotless house, well trained
dog and be happy about it all when your guests arrive. If you can’t change the
circumstances then ask yourself what you are thinking about this stress item
that is causing these adverse feelings.
Where are these negative thoughts or
overly high expectations coming from?
How are they holding power over you and
controlling you into the “crazies”?
What is the root cause and what can you do
about it prior to the event?
These are really hard questions to ask requiring you to do
some difficult emotional work, but let me tell you it is sooooo worth it! Don’t
shy away. Give it a try. You will thank yourself in the end and you are not
alone.
I just had to do this myself! My “stress person” is not coming to visit
but has recently visited some of my past turf and I was surprised at my
emotional reaction to the news. It was ugly. I needed to do some investigative
work as to what was still going on in my heart concerning this person. The hard
work paid off to peace on my end whether this person shows up in my future or
not.
I don’t want my Christmas to be hijacked by my habit of
over-committing to social events. I also don’t want my thoughts about people in
my life or my habit of setting sky high expectations to cause negative feelings
and actions ruining a beautiful holiday. I hope you feel the same. I really am
preparing myself to be serene, joyful and calm this season – enjoying every
minute. I hope you are now, too.
Watch for follow up articles in
the next posts where we cover the body and soul portions of the triad.
